I recently started working with early school leaving, the phenomenon that at the time of my father and my mother was mainly due to economic need, family pushing parents to choose who their children would 'have' to continue her education after high school and those who would 'have to' contribute to the formation of family income. There were the 'I' is not written, that often determine a family's investment on the training of younger children, while the first-born, unless they were male, and particularly brought to the study, were in early contact with the world of work, supported and urged on by a deep sense of family loyalty, which made the effort and personal renunciation functional survival of the family.
The guys I meet are generally stopped school after several attempts in different institutes, the yield usually occurred following a gradual process of disinvestment of training, accelerated by the increasing frustration in comparison with the schools, in the absence a strong family network behind him.
meeting with most of these young adults I was struck by the feeling of loneliness that I felt a loneliness related to a sense of responsibility to yourself and your 'duty', as if they had to face it alone, as if they could not lean on the family and enjoy the years of training. The urgency is palpable in these talks. I tried to ask one of them because it was so important for him to find a job immediately, so that they can not even consider the possibility of returning to study at least for a few years since the family's economic situation was fairly stable , the answer was something like this "Now I turned eighteen, now has to change to force something, I must be more responsible, I have to be independent and work for my future." A full answer of 'I' in some respects irreproachable, which refers to an ideal of autonomy and a bit strong 'against the tide', when considering that for several years Our nation faces the opposite phenomenon, that of the so-called eternal 'boys', also known by the term for 'big babies'.
Reflecting on what I wrote, I seem to be facing a different trend, but also family, which links all the cases of dropping out, but it certainly is representative of a number of them and that reminds me memories of a much discussed topic in the literature, one of the rites of passage and their progressive development.
As we become adults today? How do I become self-employed if you study up to thirty years old and lives with his family until marriage? And wives who become adults? And if we get married? It makes adults who live alone? It is the work that marks a passage certain, secure and recognized?
meeting with these guys feel they need to mark the end of a stage, motion to say 'I'm already over,' as if the uncertainty that characterizes the adolescent period, has become intolerable and there was the need to stop on something, to give themselves a sense attaccandovisi.
My hypothesis also stem from hearing the stories of these young adults, with their exploration of possible identities, the choice of one of them, a fashion, lifestyle, and generally lived as a failure. Most of the time an initial stiffness within a choice of identity, which has engulfed every aspect of their daily lives, there was a disinvestment its more or less rapidly, accompanied by a visceral need to be anchored to something solid, because it is in the midst of the 'sea' of the streets was and still is possible too frustrating.
In this I think it adds a strong need to demonstrate competence to themselves, using age as a concrete means for having such un'agognata autonomy and identity are often very blurred that perhaps it would be less if it could boast of a job and economic revenue, as a way of saying 'I worked, even if not in school I did, I found work in my redemption '! From here is the determination that these young women and young men wear these talks, hope and gaze focused on the future, as if it were recently discovered to be able to direct their process without suffer it. It's great desire to take the reins with awareness, knowing where to go, not to be direct. However, increasingly, to know these young adults, I note that the greatest obstacle for them is to the report, the relationship with the other, full of potential provocations and misunderstandings, often experienced very little belly and mind with the facts than with words. In essence, the problem sometimes is that for these children of the estate, lack of diplomatic skills, impulses out of control, aggression, yet clumsily handled, which often ends up acting to activate various kinds (fight, flight, withdrawal, avoidance ..) that frequently lead to the accumulation of several academic failure and working. Awareness of the role that this relationship brings trouble in pursuit of its objectives is low, sometimes absent, that vision still blurred by rigidly 'egocentric', that prevents to grasp situations and questioning.
So I think that the possible use of meeting spaces protected, in which to reconstruct their history and acknowledge its skills and resources, is an important condition to help these children acquire greater self-awareness, so as to better focus their needs and the various nuances of their identity.
encounter with another inevitable consequence of a new self-awareness and the ability to change their attitudes so as to make them more functional. This growth would not lead to career choice with a broader knowledge of their own resources and limits and with more soft skills, leaving more open to the possibility of a future return to school, maybe this evening. In interviews with these young with these young men and women I feel successful when I can take over the meetings that process of openness to different possibilities by relaxing the 'I' and more visible the deep needs of each individual.
